Friday 19 February 2010

The Band (2009)

At a glance:
Aussie rock n roll soft porn (or hard core if you landed yourself the longer 90min version). Here's one that won't make the Australian Film Festival lineup at GSC next month. You can expect dirty toilet sex, semen on speakers, lesbo lovin and the sinkin feelin of havin wasted a good hour of your life when the credits roll.
Bad news on the doorstep:
Women ain't beautiful nor compellin, mostly pierced and tattooed white trash. Almost had enough to tell a story but nope, it was decidedly sex and more sex. Don't remember the music. Distinct lack of humour. There also seems to be some misandry goin on, what with the number of lesbo scenes and how all the men are complete muppets.
Reminds me of:
You know that movie where they keep cuttin between a concert and a lovers' tryst, 9 Songs (2004)?
Amacam joker, berapa bintang lu mau kasi?
Watch on fast forward. Who is this Anna Brownfield writer director anyway? The Band (2009) is probably not for you.
Bonus material:
I suppose this is director Anna Brownfield hard at work.

Thursday 18 February 2010

The Book Of Eli (2010)

"Are you sure you're 18?"
At a glance:
The end may be nigh but not for post-apocalyptic movies. Denzel Washington's survivor feature is a well-contained, half-engagin, action drama best commended for not resortin to the all-too-easy wasteland CGI we've been seein too much lately in movies like 2012 and I Am Legend. Directin it are the Hughes twins (From Hell, Menace II Society) who give the picture an ashen sepia feel all throughout Eli's decimated dystopia, an illiterate world populated with rummagin cannibals and Mad Max characters. While the picture isn't particularly rich nor does it have too many cultural references, Book Of Eli is steady and focused, just like the titular journeyman who has been walkin West for 30 years carryin the last bible on Earth (which happens to be a KJV, gimme a break!) and villainous town elder Carnegie (Gary Oldman) has set his eyes on it. Joinin the story are loyal concubine Claudia (Jessica Beals, Flashdance) and her bratty-but-seekin daughter Solara (Mila Kunis, That '70s Show). Other notable appearances include Tom Waits (Imaginarium Of Doctor Parnassus) and Malcolm McDowell (A Clockwork Orange).
Bad news on the doorstep:

Strange co-producer Washington has to play a restrained, charmless hero here, when the story could have benefited with an anti-hero or villain who trash-talks, somethin he's more adept at doin in movies like Training Day and American Gangster; or an outright, desperate good guy in movies like John Q and Fallen. The direction doesn't allow for his powerhouse actin and nobody watchin this film for him would be pleased with the experience because the movie doesn't really need him at all. Despite a solid premise, the correspondin lack of engaging dialogue between all characters is apparent.
Reminds me of:

Haneke's Time Of The Wolf and a bit of that entertainin flop Waterworld.
Watch out for:

Details!
Most memorable line:

One of the few rare moments of humour in the film when Eli is asked about whether he's quotin the bible and answers: "No, it's Johnny Cash. Live at Folsom Prison."
Amacam joker, berapa bintang lu mau kasi?

Three stars. A missed opportunity but studio suits won't bein a hurry to shout remake or sequel, which would be a good progression. The last shot with Mila Kunis does make her look like a leaner Angelina Jolie playin Terminator's Sarah Connor.

Tuesday 16 February 2010

Barbi3 (2008)

Titi Kamal naked sex Poppy Sovia Francine Roosenda cathy sharon tits rosmah fat bitch birkin bagAt a glance:
Ngapain sih lu? Nggak ngapa-ngapain kok. Just watchin a stupid movie every now and then to keep it real. Didn't know I'd really hit it though. This is Monty Tiwa's idea of an Indon answer to Mean Girls, where Titi Kamal (centre), Poppy Sovia (left) and Francine Roosenda (right) play the most irritatin wannabe American highschool girls ever.
Bad news on the doorstep:
Titi O Titi, you ain't got much time left. Wonder how her restaurant's doin. Borin, overdone teen plot. Fluff.
Watch out for:
Cathy Sharon as Helen. Like Liv Tyler took Teri Hatcher's lips and turned Indon.
Amacam joker, berapa bintang lu mau kasi?
Some decent music, the Melly Goeslaw title track sang by Rossa especially. Unexpected depth in dialogue every now and then. If you buy the VCD, there's a 15-minute featurette at the end to console you. ★★

Monday 15 February 2010

Up In The Air (2009)

At a glance:
Commitment-phobia never looked sexier than when skirt-chasin extraordinaire George Clooney plays Ryan Bingham, the cocksure, jet-settin elitist who spends all his time flyin, as the movie title suggests. For a drama with many depressive elements, Up In The Air is surprisingly just as upliftin as it sounds, as Thank You For Not Smoking and Juno director Jason Reitman predictably followed up those two thematically similar films with this one. No surprise then that it's in the runnin for Best Pic at the 82nd Oscars. Adapted off the 2001 Walter Kirn novel of the same name, we follow the globe-trottin Mr Bingham as he travels from city to city to fire people as a specialist consultant hired by bosses too gutless to drop the axe face-to-face when downsizin companies. He may call it 'career transition counsellin' but make no mistake, it's a dirty job of having to tell people they've lost their jobs. The story is enriched by his chance meet with an equally self-centred traveller who becomes his romantic interest (Alex Goran played by a delectable Vera Farmiga, The Departed) and also the introduction of a young, overly-idealistic, go-gettin colleague (Natalie Keener played by Anna Kendrick, Jessica in the Twilight movies) who has persuaded the boss (Jason Bateman) to try out a new semi-confrontational video conferencin method of firin people.
Most memorable line:
Some animals were meant to carry each other to live symbiotically over a lifetime. Star crossed lovers, monogamous swans... We are not swans. We are sharks.
Amacam joker, berapa bintang lu mau kasi?
Four stars. A refreshin, cynical take on our name brand society. It's only natural that Americans in particular warm up to this picture all too easily. While it isn't a morally punishin film, it is one with clear and sharp ideas on lifestyle choices and their correspondin consequences, with some very interestin scenes that play on a more sociological wide angle rather than a private behavioural breakdown. Followin the character arc of the very dislikeable Ryan Bingham is an engrossin prospect, as his values are tested and he even has the option of redemption. The film finishes strong and leaves you as a rather intimate, though wordy movie that entertains and rewards nevertheless. Very strong performances by the main cast will go some way to make this a worthy Best Picture contender.

Saturday 13 February 2010

72 Tenants Of Prosperity (2010) @ 72 家租客

72 Tenants Prosperity Alan Tam Anita Yuen Carina Lau Charmaine Sheh naked Chinese sex Eric Tsang Fala Chen Hong Kong callgirl Jacky Cheung Kate Tsui Kelly Chen Lam Ka Tung Lam Suet Michael TseBone Town
At a glance:
72 Tenants Prosperity Alan Tam Anita Yuen Carina Lau Charmaine Sheh naked Chinese sex Eric Tsang Fala Chen Hong Kong callgirl Jacky Cheung Kate Tsui Kelly Chen Lam Ka Tung Lam Suet Michael TseReferencing the Shaw Bros 1973 classic The House Of 72 Tenants, the decidedly crowded 72 Tenants Of Prosperity is a colourful (though not necessarily nutritious) addition to the Chinese New Year movie calendar which will invariably draw laughs among all followers of Hong Kong TV and cinema, especially those with a history of TVB fandom. There's like 180 known actors in it! In this 2010 reupdate, the paedophile politicians and brothel owners are missin and they've been replaced by fish ball noodle hawkers and manga sellers. We get intermittent flashbacks to 70s HK where the events of Sai Yeung Choi Street originally took place: 72 tenants who battled greedy landlords, with a love triangle that gave rise to a family feud. In the present day, the feud continues with the same triangle still festering but now it's a full-on Romeo and Juliet adventure as the next generation start to commit inter-family relationships of their own.
I can't remember if I cried:
When I read this cast list: Jacky Cheung, Eric Tsang, Anita Yuen, Lam Ka Tung, Charmaine Sheh, Fala Chen, Michael Tse, Bosco Wong, Linda Chung, Stephy Tang, Wong Cho Lam, Joyce Cheng, Lawrence Ng, Ron Ng, Kevin Cheng, Kenneth Ma, Kate Tsui. Kelly Chen, Sunny Chan, Joe Ma, Ben Wong, Natalie Tong, Leung Ka Ki, Timmy Hung, Joel Chan, Carina Lau, Alan Tam, Natalis Chan, Chin Siu Ho, Wayne Lai, Nancy Sit, Tony Leung Ka Fai, Sammy Leung, Dicky Cheung, Andy Hui, Tin Kai Man, Sam Lee, Ella Koon, Bernice Liu, Kayi Cheung, William So, Wu Fung, Louis Yuen, Raymond Lam, Justin Lo and Myolie Wu.
Watch out for:
Unlike similar projects with jarrin cameos, this one goes at it casual with a most light-hearted and non-committal approach. Story is funny in a giggly way and a truly inspired highlight is when Jacky Cheung and Wong Cho Lam do a play of Jackie's hit number.
72 Tenants Prosperity Alan Tam Anita Yuen Carina Lau Charmaine Sheh naked Chinese sex Eric Tsang Fala Chen Hong Kong callgirl Jacky Cheung Kate Tsui Kelly Chen Lam Ka Tung Lam Suet Michael TseAmacam joker, berapa bintang lu mau kasi?
Decent family fun. The film must also be credited with one of the most original and inoffensive way to execute the obligatory product placements. They un-apologetically sang our all the sponsor names to the tune of a traditional New Year tune while holding out title cards and liftin household appliances! Do tell the kids not to copy all the swearin. ★★★
Desktop Strippers

Alan Tam, Anita Yuen, Carina Lau, Charmaine Sheh, Chinese New Year, comedy, Eric Tsang, Fala Chen, Hong Kong, Jacky Cheung, Kate Tsui, Kelly Chen, Lam Ka Tung, Lam Suet, Michael Tse,